Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Turning 30...

Today is my 30th birthday.

It is my first birthday without my Dad here to celebrate.

I didn't feel right letting the day go by without mentioning that I am thinking of my Dad today. His absence has left a huge void in my special day.

I will miss him on my car ride to work. Any other year, he would have called me as I started my day to wish me a good one. I'm sure he would have had some snappy one-liner about me turning 30 this year. I will miss hearing it.

I will miss him arranging my family "birthday dinner." We would usually celebrate my birthday and my sister Michelle's birthday the same night. Any other year, he would have called us earlier in the week to make sure he and Mom planned a dinner that would please both of us. And...it always did. I probably would have requested his smoked pork chops glazed with orange juice.

I will miss opening his gift...especially his card. While my mom would find a card to capture how proud they were of the adult I had grown to be, my Dad would find a card that captured his quick wit and great sense of humor. I often got cards that mentioned my messy room, terrible driving record, or how I still kept him up at night worrying...which wasn't far from the truth.

So today I am 30. A new chapter in my life has begun. One I wish my Dad was here to see.

In my 30s: I look forward to giving Jackson a sibling (or two), watching my children grow, and teaching them everything my parents taught me (even Cave Man Named Dave). I look forward to spending this next decade with Justin as we finally settle down and find a place to raise our family. I look forward to cherishing old relationships and fostering news ones. I have had a tough year - 29 was tough. Yet, I know there is more to come. More tough days, more great days. I look forward to each...

P.S. I did hear back-fat starts at 30...not looking forward to that. :)

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